'Simplicity Translator...'
'Absurdity Translator...'

'The Ghost Within The Machine'

'Welcome to, 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'

However you arrived, landed or crashed onto this page, welcome!  You've found the home of, 'Professor, Terry Mace' and, 'The Black Dog Sound Machine', his, 'Autobiographical Engine Of Discovery, Delight And Destabilisation'.  If you're, confused, amused or interested in exploring the extraordinary, bizarre and down right absurd and simplistic autobiographical life story of, Terry Mace, please enter.  You will not be dissapointed!  Shocked, stunned and horrified perhaps, but not bored!  What you will find is quite simply absurd so you better wrap up warm and get yourself settled in for the next several months!


So, if, Terry Mace's story sounds like it's your bag, what have you got to loose by putting your head around the door?  Well, maybe your head?  After all, why would you even want to go into a darkened room?  You think I'm joking!  Regardless, you're here right now, so, what's it to be?  'Enter or Exit'.  Both are a personal choice and yours to make as you see fit.  Whatever you do next, don't waste your time!  It will never return to you again, ever.  Here's the very basics, this website is autobiographical and 'Self Analytical' in nature and, it will slowly uncover as time goes on the primary experimental answers to, Professor, Terry Mace's core question!

'Who The Fuck Is, Terry Mace?











































If I'm totally honest, authentic and integral, it's my sincere and genuine hope that we will find out together who I am.  For myself, Terry Mace, it's time to expose and make naked, 'The Ghost Within The Machine'  But, and it's a very BIG but!  In creating this, autobiographical website project I have needed to ask myself a few other questions than just, who the fuck I am.  Here's the biggest questions I've asked myself so far!  Who, honestly is the really most qualified, informed, able and knowledgeable person other than, Terry Mace to speak about himself?


Who, would that person be other than, Terry Mace?

Who, is the better placed to have answers?


And, is the holder of, his life's archives, memories and quest, Terry Mace's or another's to pen to write to scribe here online for all the world to see?  And so, these are his, 'Black Dog Truths', and, 'His Black Dog Lies', it's his life story, adventure and journey, and not another's.  Terry Mace now feels that his website project is enough in itself!  He, is enough within himself!  If you come back here to the machine often to explore, excellent, fantastic I thank you for doing so.  Hopefully, you'll ultimately see the sense in being a smart monkey.


'Please, Continue To Grow, Evolve And Transform!  You Have But One Life!

Don't Waste It!  LIVE Dangerously!  Be Dangerous!  Follow Your Bliss'



Hopefully, you and I will know me a little better by the time I die and the last ever page that I will ever record here is done as I turn to particles of dust once more to be absorbed back into the fabric of nature.  However, if this is your first and last time here, because quite simply, you're shit scarred of going inside, Terry Mace's dark dog machine, 'Fuck You Very Much' I'm glad you visited.  Even, if but briefly.  I wish you nothing more than you create yourself in your life, and whilst I suspect that your own life will be as meaningless as all lives ultimately are before you die, I really do wish you sincerely, the best life possible as a, Stupid Monkey!  Ultimately, we all have to meet, 'The Ghost In The Machine!'  Eventually, we all have to see it, communicate with it and make it our friend!  Sometimes, the only way to start moving forwards again in our lives, is by going backwards over them!


Finally, it's your choice, in or out, enter or exit, come or go, be or do,

Live or die, breath or choke, love or hate, give or take, enter or exit...

Enter The Black Dog Sound Machine

'Do You Want To Get, Fucked Up?'

That's Fine By Us, Enter When Ready...

'We've All Got It!' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'Black Dog Lives Matter' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'Spiritual Bypassing' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'The Art Of Profanity' - PDF - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'No Stupid People Beyond This Point!' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'If You're Offended, Fuck You!' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'Can You Speak Freely?' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'Panic Pussy Presser' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'
'This Machine Should Not Be Operated By Idiots' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'

Alternatively, You Can Email, Subscribe Or Call To Find Out More!

Telephone: +44 7765501750


(24/7 Voicemail - No Message = No Response!  Really!)

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Alternatively, To The Alternatives, You Can Check Out,

Professor, Terry Mace's, 'Amazing Autobiographical Life Story' Within,


'The Black Dog Blog & Vlog!'


*'The Professor's 6 Step Telegram Chat Challenge'

The Professor's 6 Step Telegram Chat Challenge: 1. Ask Me Anything, Anything At All!  2.  No Topic Or Subject Is Barred Or Taboo!  3.  Decide What Type Of Response You Wish To Receive From Me - 'Simple or Absurd'.  4.  Place Your Response Preference With Your Question.  5.  Wait For Your Answer!  6.  Repeat As Necessary Changing Your Response Preference As You Desire!  Play Rough, Play Dirty, But, If You Give It, Be Prepared To Take It Back!  Good Luck...


*Very interesting, unusual or simply absurd telegram chat challenger chats, may, be shared publicly!

'Post It Note' - 'The Black Dog Sound Machine'

**'For Those Who Wish To Send Me, 'Answers On A Postcard', Love Letters & Interesting Gifts'

**Letter Bombs, Russian Chemical Agents, Hate Mail & Blackmail,

Will Be Returned Primed & Active For Your Own Destructive Pleasure!

No Return Address Is Necessary To Find You, Hunt You Down & Then...   ...You Get The Picture!

'Oh, Did I Not Mention, Terry Mace Once Made,

Letter Bombs And Trained In, Hunter Force Skills!  My Bad'


Professor, Terry Mace.  'The Black Dog Sound Machine Laboratory'.

Loanhead Cottage.  Fisherie.  Turriff.  Aberdeenshire.  Scotland.  AB53 5QN.